Refill with Randy – Importance of practicing ‘Self-fulness’

By Randy LeBaron

Good morning! Grab your favorite cup. Fill it up. And let’s start this week right TOGETHER!!!

Today I want to talk about the importance of practicing self-fulness. No, I did not spell that wrong and no I do not know if it is a real word or if I just made it up.

What I do know is that selfishness is being concerned, sometimes excessively or exclusively, for oneself or one’s own advantage, pleasure, or welfare, regardless of others, is bad. Selflessness, on the other hand, is the act of sacrificing one’s own interest for the greater good.

What often gets overlooked though is the fact that you cannot pour from an empty cup. This is where the concept of self-fulness comes in. It is the act of caring for your own welfare so that you are able to care for the welfare of others. It is something I often talk about with my hospice patients’ families.

Another way to look at it is to think about the safety speech given at the beginning of every flight. The flight attendant goes over what to do in a number of given scenarios so that the passengers are prepared for the worst and when they get to the part about oxygen masks dropping down from overhead they always stress that if you are traveling with a child you should put your oxygen mask on first before helping your child put theirs on.

The reason they emphasize this so much is two-fold: firstly, because if you try put the oxygen mask on your child first and you pass out you will be of no more help to them and secondly, because they know that a parent’s initial instinct would be to help their child before themselves. I mean, it just seems like that would be the selfless thing to do, the better thing, and yet it is not the best thing.

Probably one of the hardest lessons that I have had to learn over the past 30 years in ministry is how to say no. I prefer to say yes. I like to help people. I like to be able to meet a need. It is in my nature. Unfortunately, that attitude has also gotten me to the point of being spread so thin at times that I end up getting sick or so overwhelmed and exhausted that I am unable to be of help to anyone.

In Scripture, there is an account in Mark 1:35-39 where Jesus gets up early in the morning and goes off by himself to a solitary place to pray. This was his “me time” if you will. It is like sneaking downstairs before the kids wake up to enjoy that first cup of coffee.

For Jesus it was a time of being poured into by his Father in preparation for the day ahead. And soon enough his kids, aka the disciples, find him and try to convince him to go back to where all the people were eagerly waiting for him to meet their needs. Not only did Jesus get refilled after already pouring himself out to the people but he also got reminded of the bigger picture. This helped him to say no and instead to instruct the disciples to follow him as he traveled to help different people with different needs.

I don’t know about you but if even Jesus needed to practice self-fullness then I think we need to as well. Here are seven suggestions to start with followed by a prayer that I wrote a few years ago.

• Spend time daily in silence and solitude

• Learn to say “Yes” to better things by saying “No” to some things

• Decide what things you can delegate to others

• Start a rhythm of taking a regular Sabbath rest

• Do a “Digital Detox”

• Make space in your life for people and pastimes that refill and recharge you

• Drink that second cup of coffee

To The Father of the Fatherless, The God of all Grace, The Shepherd of My Soul,

The One—

Who empties me of all my sin and self So that I can be filled with His Spirit Who empties me of all my pride So that I can put other’s interests ahead of my own Who empties me of all my anger and hate So that I can learn to love even those who would wish me harm Who empties me of all my greed So that I can be generous on every occasion Who empties me of all my ambitions So that I can put His Agenda ahead of my own Who empties me of all my words So that I can hear His Whisper

Help Me—

To be still long enough to sense when Your Spirit is stirring To be silent long enough to recognize the sound of Your Voice To stay in solitude long enough to realize that I am never really alone To set aside a Sacred Space where I can invite You to commune with my soul To see in The Scriptures what You want to say to me and through me each day To simplify my life by getting rid of the stuff that trips me up and slows me down To see each day as a Sacrament and the world as Your Sanctuary

Thank you—

For creating me, for sending Christ for me, for hearing my cry, for curing my soul, for calling me son. Amen.

See you in two weeks!

Pastor Randy